Salam wbt.. a post which i should've posted on the day i just wrote everything randomly on my notes regarding this feeling..yes, the feeling of being afraid that the dunya will overtook the place of Allah in my heart.. The only heart i have. afraid of the feeling that the fear of exams will overcome my fear towards Allah, hence at that time i decided to leave all my reading stuffs on that day.i'm so ruined,confused and puzzled. got lots to study.at that time i was studying 天然化学( sorts of things like organic chem) and 無機化学(inorganic chem) if im not mistaken,when suddenly,i left my study table, took my purse, and just went straight away to get some fresh air and do some reflections while seeing Allah's creation..subhanallah:') sgt menenangkn mse tu! Btol la firman Allah, "Sesungguhnya pada kejadian langit dan bumi dan pada pertukaran malam dan siang, ada tanda-tanda (kekuasaan, kebijaksanaan dan keluasan rahmat Allah) bagi orang-orang yang berakal." (3:190)
Ya Allah,ble fkir2 balik knape la kne takot while everything sume bnde Allah dah decide utk kita kan.rezeki kita sume bnde Allah dah tetapkan mengikut keperluan stiap hambaNya. Maybe sbb ble teringt yg, if i failed a paper for my final exam, i really need to attend repeat exam and everything.Seriously, study mmg mcm hape je.Tunggang terbalik dahh.. Sbb tkot punye psl xbole balik kan.Tiket flight sume dh beli dah. And tiket flight tu mmg exactly the date of our last day of school. And repeat exam will be held just another week after. So kalo ttbe kene attend repeat exam mmg kne batal sume tiket flight, and mcm mane nk cari duet nk beli tiket flight yg bru kan. And adek perempuan fiqah plak patah tgn sbb jatuh dari katil kt asrama dye. And i just heard from my mom that, aisyah ttbe jd kurang happy utk stdy kt tadika after a girl in her class scolded her during school time. Just need to give some encouragements to aisyah!:( ya Allah, please, i really need to go back this time:'(
And yes, of course rindu seorg anak pd mak ayah:( xtahu la knape since i was in highschool, preparatory prog and till now, mengada sgt nk homesick..
Hmmm.. Pape pun, mmg kene check and audit diri balik kan. Kene hati blh jd lemah sgt mcm tu.. And ble fiqah pkir balik, why do i have to be afraid, sdgkn Allah ble Ida katakan KUNFAYAKUN, maka jdilah ia biarpun seluruh dunia mahu menolaknya.. Allah:') begitulah ditetapkn smula keyakinan ini pd sang Pencipta.. Moga azam tetap trus teguh dan digenggam penuh tabah!
Salam mujahadah buat smua:)
The picture of my stuffs at that time. Too miserable right?! I even tried to stdy two subjects at a time!